Funny Life Quotes

Welcome to my funny life quotes page. We all take life too seriously sometimes I certainly do. These quotes bring the humor in this mystery we call life. It reminds us not to take this precious time we have on earth too seriously and enjoy the ride.

• FUNNY LIFE QUOTE OF THE PAGE
  Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead.
  Author Unknown


• Life is a sexually transmitted disease and the mortality rate is one hundred percent.
  R. D. Laing


• Life is like an onion. Why is life like an onion? Because you peel away layer after layer and when you come to the end you have nothing.
  Yiddish Proverb


• Life is an incurable disease.
  Abraham Crowle


• Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
  John Lennon


• Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.
  Elbert Hubbard


• Live every day as if it were your last, because one of these days you will be right.
  Author Unknown


• You live and you learn or you don't live long.
  Robert A. Heinlein


• Life is not so bad if you have plenty of luck, a good physique and not too much imagination.
  Christopher Isherwoo


• Life is like stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea and sink
  . Shunryu Suzuki


• Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.
  Fran Lebowitz


• The trouble with life is that there are so many beautiful women and so little time.
  John Barrymore


• Life is just one damned thing after another.
  Erbert Hubbard


• It's not true that life is one damn thing after another; it is one damn thing over and over.
  Edna St. Vincent Milly


• Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast.
  Douglas Adams


• My advice to those who are about to begin, in earnest, the journey of life, is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other.
  Josh Billings


• For most men life is a search for the proper manilla envelope in which to get themselves filed.
  Clifton Fadiman


• Life is like a ten-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.
  Charles Schulz


• Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
  Jean-Paul Sartre


• Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.
  Truman Capote


• Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.
  Carl Sandburg


• Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?
  Bob Monkhouse


• An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived.
  Herbert Samuel


• Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it.
  Christopher Morley


• Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
  Will Rogers






• It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
  Author Unknown


• Life is wasted on the living.
  Douglas Adams


• Life is not a static thing. The only people who do not change their minds are incompetents in asylums, and those in cemeteries.
  Everett McKinley Dirksen


• Life is like a game of poker: If you don't put any in the pot, there won't be any to take out.
  Moms Mabley


• Life is like playing a violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.
  Samuel Butler


• Life is just a phase you're going through...you'll get over it.
  Author Unknown


• The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat.
  Lilly Tomlin


• Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
  Mark Twain


• Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.
  Brendan Gill


• Were it offered to my choice, I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults in the first.
  Benjamin Franklin


• It's possible, you can never know, that the universe exists only for me. If so, it's sure going well for me, I must admit.
  Bill Gates


• When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
  Mark Twain


• Instead of holding on to the Biblical view that we are made in the image of God, we come to realize that we are made in the image of the monkey.
  Lin Yutang


• Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told, "I am with you kid Let's go!
  Maya Angelou


• Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim
  Bertrand Russell


• In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular.
  Kathleen Norris


• The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
  George Carlin

Thank you for passing by my funny life quotes. I hope you find the laughter in life and stop taking your life too seriously. Heres to seeing the funny side to life.

Return From Funny Life Quotes To Life Quotes

Return From Funny Life Quotes To Homepage